read this stuff because it will make you more smarter.

i know a lot of stuff about television because i'm really cultured and do smart people things like watch a lot of televsion. this is the stuff i've learned from all this productivity.

AMERICA'S GOT TALENT

i would just like to start off by saying how much this show makes me want to kill everything in plain sight. it's so loud and i'm not talking about nick cannon's suits. ZING!!!!!!!! lolzzz. but seriously guys. it hurts my ears. plus the producers make the audience look like a bunch of effing idiots. they're either clapping or crying or doing both. ALL THE TIME. i feel like i'm tripping on acid when i watch this. so i usually don't but sometimes i do and that's when i get angry. basically what i'm trying to say is that this show gives me anxiety.

look at these morons.

look at these other morons.

look at this moron.

THE BACHELORETTE

ashley:

she loves fake eye lashes and boys named bentley. also her stylist should be shot.

ames:

if he had a british accent it would all make sense.

jp:

the only downside to this guy is that he has bad taste in women.



lucas:

he's a real man because he's awkward in front of the camera and wears running shoes with everything. also he loves red meat. (i do not know this fact to be true. i might have made it up. but he totally seems like the type)

mary-kate and ashley:

fraternal. not identical.

bentley:

 

this is a perfect example of why utah sucks so hard.

jeff:

autism.

KEEPING UP WITH THE KARDASHIANS

this show would be a lot better if this wet blanket wasn't in it.

this post was stupid. but i'm not apologizing for it. and now if you'll excuse me i have to go clean out my tivo.